Category: Parenting

A wide vocabulary is a good indicator of how well your child will perform academically, but how can you tell if they’re on track?

How many words does your child know? It’s fairly easy to tally them up when they’re just beginning to speak, but harder to calculate the size of their vocabulary as they hit school age and beyond.

What’s known, though, is that having a wide vocabulary sets your child up for life.

‘A child’s vocabulary is a big predictor of their future success,’ says Alice Penfold, Project Manager of the Words for Work programme at the National Literacy Trust. ‘It not only affects their chances of performing well in exams, but also their life chances.

‘For example, children who have a poor vocabulary at the age of five are four times more likely to struggle with reading as adults, and three times more prone to mental health issues.’

With this in mind, it’s well worth making an effort to build your child’s vocabulary. But how can you tell whether they know the right number of words for their age?

All children develop at different rates, so it’s impossible to say how many words your child ‘should’ know at a certain age. However, the figures below can be used as a guide.

Evidently, you’re not going to be able to count exactly how many words your child knows, but there are ways to gauge whether their vocabulary development is on track for their age.

1. Acquiring new words

Young children are like sponges, soaking up new words, and noticing your child using a greater range of words is a good measure of how their vocabulary is developing.

‘Children aged three to five can typically acquire four to six new words per day: a helpful benchmark of whether their language development is on track,’ says Alice.

2. Talking about the world around them

‘One of the best ways to tell if your child is developing vocabulary at the right rate is to listen to how they talk,’ explains Year 4 teacher Jack Phillips, who blogs about vocabulary at verbivore teacher.com.

‘Listen to how well they describe the world around them, and the range of words they use. Do they take an interest and talk about what’s going on? Are they willing to engage in conversation? How do they tell you about their day at school?’

3. Reading at the right level for their age

Take a look at books that are aimed at your child’s age group, and see whether they are able to read at this level.

‘It’s important to look at whether they’re taking in the information, as some children are very fluent readers but their comprehension isn’t at the same level,’ Jack explains. ‘Doing a bit of questioning about what they’re reading, such as asking them to sum up the last paragraph they read, will help you see whether they’re understanding the words on the page.’

Your child’s reading scheme level is a good indicator of whether they’re acquiring new words at the right rate, but also check out the books that children their age are reading for pleasure and see whether your child has a big enough vocabulary to access them.

4. Playing word games

A good test of your child’s vocabulary is to engage them in word games. Try thinking of words (hot, high, fast, bright etc) and challenging your child to tell you the opposite word (the antonym): they should be able to do this by the age of seven, or thereabouts.

Jokes are also a good way to see how your child’s vocabulary is developing. By 11, for example, they’re likely to have an understanding of how puns (jokes that exploit the different possible meanings of a word) work.

5. Reading and writing for pleasure

It stands to reason that if your child doesn’t have a good basic vocabulary, they’ll find reading and writing hard work.

‘Children who read for pleasure are 67% more likely to write at the expected level for their age,’ explains Alice. ‘If your child reads and writes purely for enjoyment, it’s a good indicator of their vocabulary.’

6. Test results

A reliable way to tell whether your child has the right vocabulary for their age is to look at their test results.

At the end of Year 2 and Year 6, your child will take SATs, and you will be told whether they are at or exceeding the expected level for their age. If they are ‘working towards’ the expected level in their English tests, it may indicate that their vocabulary could do with a boost.

7. Listening to their conversations

‘One of the best ways to tell whether your child has a good vocabulary is to overhear how they talk to their peers in the playground, on playdates or on sleepovers,’ says Jack.

‘They all develop at different rates, but are they using similar language to their friends? Can they talk about their emotions? These are good tests of their language acquisition.’ Money Management for children is also an important factor, try to teach them about money management so they have not to face any difficulties in the future.

You and your kids can look forward to exciting activities, including expert sharing sessions and workshops, exhibitions, an interactive urban garden as well as carnival booths.

Don’t miss these exciting activities at the MTL Symposium 2019:

1. Sharing sessions and workshops: Get expert tips:- Learn from the best. The event features a total of 40 sharing sessions and workshops for parents. Renowned education and curriculum experts, as well as celebrity parents, will share tips on cultivating a life-long love for MTL learning.

2. Discovery Land: Let kids flex their imagination muscles:- Your little ones are invited to immerse in an exciting discovery of their MTL through a series of interactive activities. Here, they get to role-play as explorers in an urban garden comprising a forest, a pond, flower maze and a fruit orchard.

3. Carnival: Complete the MTL Challenge to win attractive prizes:- Explore innovative ways to nurture your kids’ love for MTL at the booths set up by preschool centres, schools and community partners. Plus, you stand to win attractive prizes when they complete the MTL Challenge after visiting various booths and participating in the activities.

4. Creative Corner: Get ‘crafty’:- An area set up for you and your brood to get creative with cultural art and crafts that promote MTL learning in your daily lives.

5. Bookstore: Select resources on MTL learning:- Take your pick from a wide range of MTL learning resources, including books, CDs and picture cards.

You can help your children to learn different things from the children’s book series and they can learn about financial freedom and life lessons.

We understand your zest and that’s why here are few ways to embellish your kid’s world of colours.

Generally, children learn to identify colours by 18 months. They can name different colours by the age of 2.5-3 years. However, sometimes it can be frustrating for parents as teaching colours is not as easy as other activities, say like teaching numbers.

Why teaching colour seems complicated?

“Veronica can speak 1 to 10 and few alphabets, but when it comes to colours identification, whether I show her a blue object or green, he always defaults all objects as blue.” says the three-year-old’s mother Jeneliya.

To teach your toddler to identify a toy, shoes or names of the vehicles may seem less complicated than to teach colours as the latter is an abstract concept. Colour is a visual perceptual property of any object.

Teach with everyday activities

“You can start teaching colours to your toddlers at as early as two year. Toddlers usually love bright colours. Start teaching them the basic colours first: Red, green, yellow, blue. Let them understand the concept of these basic colours before you go beyond these four colours.” says Veronica, a child psychologist.

To stimulate these young brains is a tedious task and demands patience and creativity.

Here are 9 easy ways to teach colours to your toddlers:

1) Platter a colourful meal

“I involve my two-year-old in cooking and shopping at par with his age level. While cooking I usually keep few raw vegetables in front of my son. He loves to touch and play with different vegetables. When he asks me which vegetable that is, I say the name of vegetable with colour. Say, red tomato,” says Joseph. Wonderful, isn’t it?

Understand your child’s interest and use that way to teach him/her the new concepts such as colours as Joseph does.

As you serve different foods, introduce the food items with its colour.Like green vegetables, white rice, brown bread, red pepper, yellow lentil soup, etc.

2) Songs and rhymes

According to studies, there’s a strong influence of music in a child’s development. Get few DVDs of audio visual animated songs and rhymes teaching shades and watch them with your child. Cheer up your toddler by getting involved with him/her. Children tend to remember rhymes easily as it provides practical example at certain extent.

3) Compare identical objects

Your toddler is still learning new words every day. If you compare two different objects while teaching colour, you would make the process more complicated.

“It will be easier for a child to distinguish the colours of red ball and green balloon/ball than red ball and green sweater. Comparing two identical objects will make the differentiation between the colours more clear,” says , a preschool teacher at Little Diamonds School.

4) Games and puzzles

Other things that are close to children’s heart are games and toys. Get your child a few attractive and brightly coloured toys, puzzle games, alphabet blocks, colour matching and memory games etc.

If your toddler already has few of these, then pull those fun games out and let them play and explore their world of colours while even learning alphabets, numbers.

5) DIY colour books

How interesting would it be to give a modern touch to a traditional learning! Ask your toddler to collect the objects of the same colour and then ask him/ her to draw them in colour picture book.

You can even take the photo prints of the objects with same colour and ask your toddler to paste them in the do-it-yourself (DIY) book. Your kid will definitely love to see this self made book again and again.

6) Hand painting

Toddlers learn by touching various objects, more interestingly, of different colours. To enhance their sensory skills and creativity, engage your child in finger or hand painting. This will pull his/her attention to different bright colours and he/she will be more interested to learn them. You can use homemade finger paint, which is safe to use. 

7) Colour with crayons

“I let her pick the crayon of her choice and scribble with it on the paper, then label her choice with name of the colour while she is holding, feeling the crayon touch to the page,” says Oliver, a working mother.

8) Favourite dressings

“My son loves a red tee and blue pant. Whenever he points out at his favourite clothes, I always say him that even today you will wear the same red tee and blue pant. With repetition, he has learnt at least these two colours very easily,” says a mom, smiling.

Take an advantage of the ‘favourite dressing’ phenomenon of your child and tag his/her favourite dressing with names of their colours.

9) Get close to nature

“Whenever we are outdoors, my princess loves to observe various things and animals around and asks me bundles of questions”, says a friend of mine, Veronica, a coordinator at Little Scholars Preschool.

Getting closer to nature is another beautiful way to teach colours to your kid. You may introduce the colours of leaves, tree trunk, green grass, colourful butterflies, and various birds like green parrot, grey pigeon, and so on. Everyone has to maintain a financial budget and how much money should you save before having a baby, it’s difficult thing but you can learn about it just drop your comments in the comment section.

Raising kids is one of the toughest and most fulfilling jobs in the world — and the one for which you might feel the least prepared.

Here are nine child-rearing tips that can help you feel more fulfilled as a parent.

1. Boosting Your Child’s Self-Esteem

Kids start developing their sense of self as babies when they see themselves through their parents’ eyes. Your tone of voice, your body language, and your every expression are absorbed by your kids. Your words and actions as a parent affect their developing self-esteem more than anything else.

Praising accomplishments, however small, will make them feel proud; letting kids do things independently will make them feel capable and strong. By contrast, belittling comments or comparing a child unfavorably with another will make kids feel worthless.

Avoid making loaded statements or using words as weapons. Comments like “What a stupid thing to do!” or “You act more like a baby than your little brother!” cause damage just as physical blows do.

Choose your words carefully and be compassionate. Let your kids know that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them, even when you don’t love their behavior.

2. Catch Kids Being Good

Have you ever stopped to think about how many times you react negatively to your kids in a given day? You may find yourself criticizing far more often than complimenting. How would you feel about a boss who treated you with that much negative guidance, even if it was well intentioned?

The more effective approach is to catch kids doing something right: “You made your bed without being asked — that’s terrific!” or “I was watching you play with your sister and you were very patient.” These statements will do more to encourage good behavior over the long run than repeated scoldings.

Make a point of finding something to praise every day. Be generous with rewards — your love, hugs, and compliments can work wonders and are often reward enough. Soon you will find you are “growing” more of the behavior you would like to see.

3. Set Limits and Be Consistent With Your Discipline

Discipline is necessary in every household. The goal of discipline is to help kids choose acceptable behaviors and learn self-control. They may test the limits you establish for them, but they need those limits to grow into responsible adults.

Establishing house rules helps kids understand your expectations and develop self-control. Some rules might include: no TV until homework is done, and no hitting, name-calling, or hurtful teasing allowed.

You might want to have a system in place: one warning, followed by consequences such as a “time out” or loss of privileges. A common mistake parents make is failure to follow through with the consequences. You can’t discipline kids for talking back one day and ignore it the next. Being consistent teaches what you expect.

4. Make Time for Your Kids

It’s often difficult for parents and kids to get together for a family meal, let alone spend quality time together. But there is probably nothing kids would like more. Get up 10 minutes earlier in the morning so you can eat breakfast with your child or leave the dishes in the sink and take a walk after dinner. Kids who aren’t getting the attention they want from their parents often act out or misbehave because they’re sure to be noticed that way. There are many bedtime stories to read for you children which leads to develop a good relation with them. Many parents find it rewarding to schedule together time with their kids. Create a “special night” each week to be together and let your kids help decide how to spend the time. Look for other ways to connect — put a note or something special in your kid’s lunchbox.

Adolescents seem to need less undivided attention from their parents than younger kids. Because there are fewer windows of opportunity for parents and teens to get together, parents should do their best to be available when their teen does express a desire to talk or participate in family activities. Attending concerts, games, and other events with your teen communicates caring and lets you get to know more about your child and his or her friends in important ways.

Don’t feel guilty if you’re a working parent. It is the many little things you do — making popcorn, playing cards, window shopping — that kids will remember.

5. Be a Good Role Model

Young kids learn a lot about how to act by watching their parents. The younger they are, the more cues they take from you. Before you lash out or blow your top in front of your child, think about this: Is that how you want your child to behave when angry? Be aware that you’re constantly being watched by your kids. Studies have shown that children who hit usually have a role model for aggression at home.

Model the traits you wish to see in your kids: respect, friendliness, honesty, kindness, tolerance. Exhibit unselfish behavior. Do things for other people without expecting a reward. Express thanks and offer compliments. Above all, treat your kids the way you expect other people to treat you.

6. Make Communication a Priority

You can’t expect kids to do everything simply because you, as a parent, “say so.” They want and deserve explanations as much as adults do. If we don’t take time to explain, kids will begin to wonder about our values and motives and whether they have any basis. Parents who reason with their kids allow them to understand and learn in a nonjudgmental way.

Make your expectations clear. If there is a problem, describe it, express your feelings, and invite your child to work on a solution with you. Be sure to include consequences. Make suggestions and offer choices. Be open to your child’s suggestions as well. Negotiate. Kids who participate in decisions are more motivated to carry them out.

7. Be Flexible and Willing to Adjust Your Parenting Style

If you often feel “let down” by your child’s behavior, perhaps you have unrealistic expectations. Parents who think in “shoulds” (for example, “My kid should be potty-trained by now”) might find it helpful to read up on the matter or to talk to other parents or child development specialists.

Kids’ environments have an effect on their behavior, so you might be able to change that behavior by changing the environment. If you find yourself constantly saying “no” to your 2-year-old, look for ways to alter your surroundings so that fewer things are off-limits. This will cause less frustration for both of you.

As your child changes, you’ll gradually have to change your parenting style. Chances are, what works with your child now won’t work as well in a year or two.

Teens tend to look less to their parents and more to their peers for role models. But continue to provide guidance, encouragement, and appropriate discipline while allowing your teen to earn more independence. And seize every available moment to make a connection!

8. Show That Your Love Is Unconditional

As a parent, you’re responsible for correcting and guiding your kids. But how you express your corrective guidance makes all the difference in how a child receives it.

When you have to confront your child, avoid blaming, criticizing, or fault-finding, which undermine self-esteem and can lead to resentment. Instead, strive to nurture and encourage, even when disciplining your kids. Make sure they know that although you want and expect better next time, your love is there no matter what.

9. Know Your Own Needs and Limitations as a Parent

Face it — you are an imperfect parent. You have strengths and weaknesses as a family leader. Recognize your abilities — “I am loving and dedicated.” Vow to work on your weaknesses — “I need to be more consistent with discipline.” Try to have realistic expectations for yourself, your spouse, and your kids. You don’t have to have all the answers — be forgiving of yourself.

And try to make parenting a manageable job. Focus on the areas that need the most attention rather than trying to address everything all at once. Admit it when you’re burned out. Take time out from parenting to do things that will make you happy as a person (or as a couple).

Focusing on your needs does not make you selfish. It simply means you care about your own well-being, which is another important value to model for your children.

Do you have a set of house rules? If not, they can be a valuable part of any home. Similar to a family mission statement, family rules are designed to clearly describe the expectations in your home, but in a more detailed way. Family house rules don’t have to be complicated, and you don’t need to feel like a drill sergeant to enforce them. But, house rules are key to helping your family to have less stress, less conflict, less yelling, and to run smoothly.

Although the rules often change a bit as things change and kids grow older, developing some basic rules for where you are now is a great exercise in creating an efficient home that is also purposeful. The house rules we have in our family are appropriate for children of all ages from toddlers to teenagers and everything in between.

1. We are a family, first and foremost.
2. Mom and Dad are in charge. Period.
3. You will respect everyone who lives here. Always.
4. Get your kids to follow rules by setting up guidelines at home.
5. Life is not always about you, sometimes it is about others.
6. You are not expected to be perfect, therefore, you may not expect perfection from others, even Mom and Dad.
7. Sometimes grace is extended, but grace is not to be expected.
8. If you don’t have something nice to say, just keep it shut.
9. You are expected to respond or acknowledge when you are spoken to, ear buds or not.
10. If you want to add something to the family calendar, you need to give plenty of notice.
11. If you are caught lying about something, you will receive twice the consequences. Being honest is always your best option.
12. Man or woman, girl or boy, you are expected to keep your word.
13. If your plans have changed, you need to tell Mom or Dad as soon as they change.
14. It does not matter to us what happens in the lives of your friends. This is your life – you live here.
15. There are plenty of times to have a discussion, you may always speak your mind – as long as you do it in a respectful way.
16. When someone is speaking, they have the floor.
17. If you would like privileges, you will need to fulfill your responsibilities.
18. If you want to borrow something, you will need to ask & not just take it.
19. When you borrow something, you will need to return it as you found it and to where you found it.
20. There is no maid who lives here.
21. If you make a mess, clean it up.
22. When you take something out, put it back.
23. If you take the last of something, tell the person who needs to know.
24. If you break something, you will be involved in the fixing or replacing process.
25. Electronics are a privilege, not a right.

All people have fears. Given that, it’s completely normal for children, from the toddler to the teen, to be afraid of something. Fears are formed in a somewhat developmental fashion, which means that it’s often easy to predict what children will be scared of at what age.

Not surprisingly, a lot of kids (and adults) don’t like bugs. In the moment, we don’t tend to think about all the ways that insects or spiders help the food chain or the environment. Instead, bugs and spiders are frequently unwelcome and can elicit a whole gamut of responses from shrieking to crying.

But what happens when these creepy crawlies cause more than a little bit of distress?

When someone has a fear of something specific and it interferes with daily life, this may actually be a phobia. The fear is more than what would typically be expected for the situation. A child who has a phobia of bugs (entomophobia) or spiders (arachnophobia) may either completely avoid the types of insects or their eight-legged counterparts that they’re afraid of or find themselves under extreme distress in their presence. What’s more, when someone has an extreme fear of something they tend to be vigilant; they’re frequently scanning the environment for the thing they are afraid of, and they often find it.

If you’re thinking, “Who likes insects –and is this really a problem?” you’re asking the right question. Plenty of kids don’t like bees or flies for example, but they happily play at recess, attend camp or picnics and simply move away if they see a flying insect. If a bee landed near them, the child might even get a little upset, but the key point is that the child would be as upset as most people; and once the bee is gone, the child would move on and continue playing or interacting as usual. In such typical cases, kids wouldn’t give it much thought after that, either.

Children with phobias, however, are often controlled by their fears and their world starts to get smaller. For example, a child with a phobia of bugs may not be able to tolerate going to summer camp or may avoid going outside altogether. These fears can take over a family, too. Imagine trying to negotiate a family outing if one child is convinced that bugs might be there and absolutely refuses to go or has a complete meltdown when the family arrives.

The National Institute of Mental Health estimates that 5 to 12% of Americans have phobias, and it’s estimated that around 7 to 9% of children have a specific phobia. Animal, blood, storm and water-specific phobias typically develop in early childhood, whereas fears related to heights and other situations tend to emerge later.

Like other anxiety disorders, avoidance reinforces fears. Essentially, the more a child avoids situations with bugs, the less anxious they are – that part makes sense. However, in the process the child misses out on experiencing how, in fact, they can handle the situation. In the case of a bee, if the child runs away or has the parent shield them, that child doesn’t have the chance to see that they can be outside and the bee will likely fly away. Even if a child did get stung, it would hurt, but the child would be OK (barring allergies).

Similarly, if a child’s parent checked the bathroom for bugs every day, the child would feel reassured, but it would send the message, “You need me to check the bathroom to make sure things are safe.”

So what should a parent or caregiver do? Here are five things I’d suggest:

1. Validate the fear.
2. Model non-anxious coping.
3. Help your child face fears.
4. Make gradual changes
5. Practice, practice, practice.

Validate the Fear

This is really important with phobias because the child is usually far more worried about the thing than the parent. As such, it’s easy to say something like, “It’s so small!” or “You don’t have to worry about that.”

Validating lets your child know you take their fear seriously and understand that this is hard for them. Saying, “I know flying bugs really scare you” can go a long way.[ 

Model Non-Anxious Coping.

Your children are paying attention, even when you don’t think they are. Kids see their parents as models, so it’s really important to lead by example. Look for opportunities where you can practice what you preach.

In other words, if you happen to do something that’s anxiety-provoking, let your child know: “I have to admit that I was a nervous that the flu shot was going to hurt. It turns out that it wasn’t as bad as I thought.” Be honest, and realize that sharing moments where you coped with something skillfully provides a great example for your child.

Help Your Child Face Fears

We can unintentionally reinforce avoidance. That is to say we often help our children stay away from the things that scare them, which actually can make the fear stronger.

Rather than choosing a table inside and far away from any bugs, choose a table that’s near a window and say, “I know this is hard, but I know you can do it.”

Make Gradual Changes

If your child has been struggling with extreme fears of bugs for months or years, it’s not reasonable to expect your child to go on a three-day camping trip in the wilderness. Likewise, if you’ve been checking places for bugs daily, you can’t just stop doing it without a plan.

Begin by taking small steps. Sometimes just talking about bugs or looking at videos of them is a good start. Taking a 10-minute walk through a park would be a great next step.

Practice, Practice, Practice.

It takes a lot of practice to do something that one has previously avoided. In other words, your child will need a lot of exposures to get over the fear.

They will need to have a lot of opportunities to face fears and tolerate them. They don’t have to love bugs, but they need to experience what it’s like to be near them without having the type of strong reactions they’ve had before.

If informal strategies like these aren’t working and the child’s fears are leading to major avoidance – such as missing out on experiences with peers or not being able to do a family trip – it’s probably time to seek an evaluation from a mental health professional. The treatment for phobias – namely cognitive behavioral therapy – is very effective. The important thing is to address the fear, so that it doesn’t continue to disrupt your child’s life. Everyone has to maintain a financial budget and how much money should i save for a baby , it’s difficult thing but you can learn about it just drop your comments in the comment section.

A 9 year old girl has frequent meltdowns after school. She cries, yells and throws things around her room. She argues with everyone in her path until she finally collapses on her bed.

The girl’s mother is concerned she has a behavior disorder that’s worsening by the day, and she fears it could affect how she does at school as well. She has seemingly tried everything. Her daughter’s behavior is negatively impacting the whole family. Her mother hopes that therapy will help her daughter learn to deal with her anger and make better choices. Anger isn’t the problem, though. Anger is simply the symptom that rises to the surface.

What this little girl has is anxiety. Identifying signs of anxiety disorders in a child can be hard. Parents often confuse anxiety with behavior problems, because with young children, anxiety tends to manifest as changes in behavior. These changes can be subtle and hard to detect at first, but over time they snowball.

Many Children Are Affected by Anxiety Disorders

The latest statistics from the National Institute of Mental Health show that anxiety disorders affect 1 in 8 children. Untreated anxiety disorders put children at risk for a range of issues from poor school performance, difficulty maintaining peer relationships and sleep disturbance to substance abuse as they get older.

It’s important to note that anxiety is a natural reaction to stress. Some anxiety is actually good for us. That voice in your head that reminds you to jump out of the way when a car rounds a corner at a high speed is your brain reacting to stress with just the right amount of anxiety.

Anxiety becomes a problem, however, when excessive worry interferes with normal daily living for at least two weeks. For children, it’s important to pay attention to changes at school, at home and among peers. You might find that the teacher sends home glowing reports but your child lashes out at home and no longer seeks peer interaction outside of school. Childhood anxiety can be tricky, so watch for these sneaky signs if you have concerns.

Frequent meltdowns: More often than not, anxious children work hard to internalize their anxiety when they’re out in the world, coming completely unglued once they get home. Tantrums are not just for toddlers. When big kids have prolonged and frequent tantrums and struggle to regulate emotions, anxiety tends to lurk beneath the surface.

Unsure if your child’s meltdowns are truly problematic? Take note of them – literally. Jot down information about the episodes, including the time of day; potential triggers – such as hunger, exhaustion and stress; how long a meltdown lasted; and what helped your child calm down. Look for a pattern to emerge.

Sleep disturbance: Sleep issues are often misunderstood as willful, negative behavior. But many times sleep disturbance is a symptom of anxiety.

Keep a sleep log for a couple of weeks to get a baseline on your child’s sleep habits. Pay attention to these potential symptoms of anxiety:

• Difficulty falling asleep.
• Frequently waking up.
• Nightmares.
• Night terrors.
• Sleep walking, which can be related to stress, particularly if it’s out of the ordinary for your child.

School refusal: Most kids have a few days here and there when they just don’t want to go to school. That’s perfectly normal. School refusal, on the other hand, means that a child refuses to go to school on a regular basis and has problems staying in school. This issue affects 2% to 5% of school-age children, and it can reoccur during the transition to middle school and high school. Children struggling with school refusal might exhibit some of the following symptoms:

• Tantrums just prior to leaving the house.
• Physical complaints just before school, including headaches, stomach aches and sometimes even diarrhea.
• Inflexibility.
• Defiance.
• Separation anxiety.

Avoidance behaviors: Avoidance is sometimes overlooked because it doesn’t seem like a big deal if a child wants to bail on a birthday party. The key is to look for a pattern of avoidance and measure it against your child’s baseline. If your social butterfly suddenly wants nothing to do with play dates, parties and after school activities, take note.

Anxiety often seems to strike without warning to parents, but the child has likely been silently struggling for many weeks. Avoidance is simply an attempt to find emotional relief from symptoms that are difficult to manage on a daily basis.

Physical complaints: Anxious kids tend to have a long list of physical complaints. Some complaints will mimic the latest virus going around and you might think your child is physically ill. Again, always look for patterns and consider the timing of the symptoms.

The truth is that anxious kids can and do worry themselves sick. Pay attention to these common complaints among anxious kids:

• Headaches.
• Dizziness.
• Stomach problems.
• Muscle aches. That sore leg might be the result of your child clenching his leg muscles all day to stamp out anxious thoughts.
• Racing heart.
• Shortness of breath.

How to Support Your Anxious Child

Anxious feelings are part of childhood, and not all anxiety becomes an anxiety disorder. If your child experiences symptoms of anxiety for a period of two weeks or more that interfere with his or her normal daily living, seek an evaluation from a licensed mental health practitioner. If you suspect that your child’s anxiety is mild, taking these steps may help:

• Listen to your child’s feelings and talk openly about anxiety.
• Empathize with your child.
• Plan extra time for transitions.
• Understand your child’s triggers and plan ahead.
• Reduce your child’s schedule to increase downtime.
• Develop and maintain a consistent, early bedtime schedule.
• Practice deep breathing exercises together.
• Work with the classroom teacher to reduce anxious feelings at school. Keeping a stress ball in the desk can be a big help.
• Resist the urge to dismiss or downplay worries.
• Create a stress-free zone in the home, and stock it with relaxing activities, such as coloring books, stress balls, clay, Play-Doh and soothing music.
• Modify expectations, particularly during times of increased stress.

When children learn how to manage and independently cope with their triggers for anxiety – which can include exhaustion, overscheduling and school-related stress – childhood anxiety decreases. Help your child by tuning in to his or her specific worries and triggers and trying several coping strategies to find a few that work.

Anxiety in Adolescents

Anxiety is even a bigger issue as kids reach adolescence. “By the age of 18, about 30% will have had some form of anxiety disorder at that point,” says Dr. Rebecca Siegel, an adult, child and adolescent psychiatrist who practices at the Amen Clinics location in New York City. “Once kids hit puberty, it becomes a 2-1 ratio of girls to boys who is affected.”

Types of anxiety evolve in teen years, Siegel explains. Social anxiety, school- and peer-related anxiety and generalized anxiety can appear more frequently.

Signs of anxiety also change. “Adolescents will do many different things than young children,” Siegel says. Dysfunctional coping mechanisms can include increased risk of substance use, she says. School avoidance becomes more serious. “School failure is much more likely to happen in adolescents as opposed to in children,” she says.

Anxiety Dangers

As with younger kids, changes in an adolescent’s normal behavior and routines, or shifts in sleep patterns or school performance, can signal anxiety. If your child, who would usually speak to you, suddenly shuts you out, that can be a sign, Siegel says. You may notice that he or she seems anxious and stressed – more so than normal. Isolation is another red flag. “If they’re not getting treatment, many adolescents will look to self-medicate,” she says.

Self-harm is a possible sign of adolescent anxiety, particularly in girls. Self-harm includes intentional injuries such as cutting or scalding. Girls are three times as likely to harm themselves as boys, according to astudy published Oct. 18, 2017, in the journal BMJ. “Anxiety can lead to depression, which then can lead to things like self-harm,” Siegel says. “It’s imperative that parents are aware of what goes on with their kids, just as in mood and depressive disorders.” Anxiety can become so severe that kids are thinking about suicide, Siegel says.

Social Pressures

Although there can be a genetic component to anxiety, Siegel says, environmental factors that contribute to anxiety loom large in adolescence: “Peer pressure, social pressure, social media – that is a huge issue.”

Social media has been shown to increase anxiety and depression in vulnerable kids, Siegel says. “Not every kid is at risk,” she notes. “In at-risk kids, social media and other environmental factors can tremendously affect how kids feel.”

How to Support Your Anxious Teen

Anxiety is “definitely” treatable, Siegel says. Parents need to find somebody their kids can connect with. That could be a school therapist, for instance. Individual therapy is another option, and group therapy can be helpful, as well.

“Treatment can be tremendously effective, but it has to be the right treatment,” Siegel says. “In moderate to severe anxiety, the best forms are cognitive behavioral therapy, and then medication may be a part of that, as well. Research has shown that the combination of cognitive behavioral therapy and medication therapy may be more effective for some adolescents.” Therapy alone is usually the first-line treatment, she emphasizes. You can help your children to learn different things from the children’s books about economics and they can learn about financial freedom and life lessons.